The Death of Greedy Woman (Anindyanti Novita T. P.)

That girl set down there with a knife in her left hand, her eyes looked the emptiness that given by night. No one beside her, she was alone. The winds blow and play her hairs like grass in the hill. The left hand still holds a knife moved slowly, like that hand’s felt ragu to move that knife into her body. The night hidden her face, but it still showed her tears right down from her eyes. While she cried she looked the emptiness, nothing. But she still looked there, imagined, and she moved her self into Trans world, she was alone…

***

Damai nanda, she was a woman which born with all happiness that a lot of people wanted to. With her beautiful, this Javanese lady life happy with her family. As a modern woman, she has a respect family, with a good job in her field. Damai lived in Bilangan, South Jakarta. As a busier, she tried to found a new hobby that gave her a balancing life. She was tried to follow Yoga and learn about meditation. She needed to balancing her soul needing and her life needing. After followed Yoga class and meditation, Damai felt more enjoyed with her life and job. In the one evening, Damai was set in the teras her room, and do meditation. She took green tea therapy essence beside her, with meditation position, she closed her eyes, in a one breath, she tried to move into trans place and the condition become silent. In that place, she saw a blue color, always blue color, but just this evening, she saw a lace, a beautiful lace, a garden, with a bench, and someone set on the bench. Like a men, with short black hair, but after Damai moved closer, she realize that the person was girl. The familiar face…

“Hi, old Damai, how are you?”

The same face, that girl just younger than Damai, that girl was Damai face when she was 17 years old. It was odd and strange, how come? asked damai. I was your 17 years old Damai, I was in your heart, but I wanted to see you. And damai begin to start talked about anything, and in another day, Damai do the same way to see her 17 years old, not only talked about her life, but also sharing about her job, her roblem in office, her boring with her life. Till one day, when Damai see that girl in her meditation, which 17 years old said to Damai, “Leave everything…” suddenly that girl said the word and it was changed Damai, changed Damai life.

Damai felt dizzy, how come she would have left everything. She though and though, and she find the probably thing, that left everything was impossible. She felt bored, tired so much with her life, and once more again Damai talked with her 17 years old girl, and she still said, leave everything and you will find your freedom. Damai on dilemma. Her husband was kind man, but she realized that it was not enough, she wanted more, she wanted to look for something that can satisfy her soul and she knew what the decision. She would hold everything with her 17 years old girl. She leaves…

***

That night she go out from her home and tried to meditation, but a strange thing came, she did not see the blue color or that garden, she was not see anything, just a voice that she heard leave everything then she open her eyes and looked once again to her house from the place she stood, and whispered good bye

***

Damai still closed her eyes with knife in her hand. The tears came down from her eyes, no one she found in her meditation, her trans situation is empty and still that voice girl she heard, leave everything. She left her husband, left her son, and left her riches to look for something, a piece that she did not know what it, to fulfill her whole heart is. She was stayed far away with her family, she walked without though. But her meditation still failed to see that 17 years old girl, just that girl voice whish was Damai heard every day, she just said leave everything. What the last? Is it my soul? Asked Damai to herself, Damai though about her husband and suddenly she saw her husband invited her and oen his arms and said lets go home my darling. Damai stand u and wanted to run into her husband arms, but someone hold her hand, she saw that 17 years old girl hold her left which was hold a knife tightly. That girl smile for Damai, but Damai feel afraid, she wanted to stabbed the knife in her hand into that girl, but that girl stronger than Damai, Damai could not speak or asked a help to her husband, but when Damai look around to asked a hel to her husband, he just lost. There was no one stood in there except Damai and that girl, Damai almost crying and that girl huge Damai and said be patience my old Damai, be patience, just leave everything, E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G…

Damai understood what she had to do, she was into the false way, she was crazy, and she just realize that she was alone now. No husband, no friends and home, even no that 17 years old girl. Nothing. Blood came out from her breast. The night, the wind, the grass and the moon became witness that a woman died, suicide her self because of her greedy feeling in her life.

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